The Rams look overmatched in the trenches again this week as 4.5-point home underdogs to Arizona. Nick Foles remains starting QB, as Jeff Fisher continues to look BRILLIANT for letting the concussed Case Keenum finish the Baltimore game. And in an injury that has transformed the season for the entire team, it doesn't look good for Robert Quinn to play again. They're going to have to find a way to get Todd Gurley going; I would go with a lot of old-fashioned I-formation with Cory Harkey lead-blocking. Please do what Cincinnati did a couple of weeks ago. Double-team the guy next to Calais Campbell and run on that side. They need as many bodies in Campbell's way as possible. They have to strongly consider using a lot of no-huddle to get Foles comfortable. Defensively, I can't see them getting much pressure on Carson Palmer without doing a lot of blitzing. So if the secondary doesn't have its act together any better than last week, I hope you at least have Larry Fitzgerald on your fantasy team. I wish the Rams had more going for them here than hoping Arizona is looking ahead to their Thursday night game against Minnesota, but here we are.
Injury updates: Besides Quinn, it also looks pretty sure that Greg Zuerlein will miss another game. Surprise #1 just came in: Keenum has passed the concussion protocol and is active, backing up Foles. Over/under for time he takes the field is halftime. Zuerlein and Quinn are officially inactive, and, uh-oh, so is Trumaine Johnson again this week. Yeah, start your Cardinal fantasy receivers. That means Rob Havenstein will dress, but that meant absolutely nothing last week.
Andre Ellington (turf toe) is inactive for Arizona, who's already missing starting RB Chris Johnson, so the Rams will have a shot at hacking some fumbles loose from rookie David Johnson. The Rams will also not be able to further pad Frostee Rucker's (ankle) Hall-of-Fame resume as he is inactive today. (Inactives courtesy of Jim Thomas' Twitter feed)
506 Sports says today's game call will by by Chris Myers and Ronde Barber for Fox, though if Ronde really wanted to golf or something this weekend, who'd know if it was really Tiki in the booth? Football Zebras says Bill Vinovich is refereeing the game; if referees got a championship belt, he'd be wearing it as the ref who worked the last Super Bowl. He has been dreadful in past Rams games, though not the one he worked last year, so anything could happen here.
FIRST QUARTER
JOHNNY HEKKER kicks off for the Rams - why? Zach Hocker blasted both his kicks last week through the end zone. It's a touchback because the Cardinals don't field it cleanly at the goal line. Quick 6 yards for David Johnson, running through a STUPID overshift. T.J. McDonald nearly blows up Carson Palmer on a blitz the next play, but, NATURALLY, Palmer gets away, the Rams leave TE Darren Fells WIDE OPEN, and he runs through at least three Rams for a TWENTY-TWO yard gain, and it took me exactly two plays to get sick of this team again this week. What the hell was Laurinaitis doing on that play, besides leaving Fells open by 5 yards? 3 more for Johnson past a double-teamed Aaron Donald. Good rush, good deep coverage by Janoris Jenkins on a deep pass out-of-bounds. 3rd-7. And what doesn't go wrong this next play? Gregg Williams LUDICROUSLY has every DB TEN YARDS off the receivers on 3rd-and-7. Here's a big surprise - Michael Floyd open downfield for 20. And that's not even the half of it.
T.J. McDonald has got to go. I have had enough of this bullshit with him. If they can flip him for a draft pick in the offseason, even a 7th-rounder, they should do it. I am completely sick of this idiot. Trying to jack Floyd up, he puts his head down, misses him by four feet and absolutely destroys his teammate, Jenkins, with a helmet-to-helmet blast. T.J. McDonald would have to be worth eight Pro Bowls to be worth the damage he has done TO HIS OWN TEAM the past two seasons. E.J. Gaines last year, Alec Ogletree and now Jenkins this year all taken out of action by this god damn idiot. THEIR TEAMMATE. All of McDonald's biggest hits the last three years have been against his own damn team. The Rams are the only team in the league that needs to fear him as a hitter. I would cut his ass right now. Cody Davis at least won't KILL HIS OWN TEAMMATES.
3 for Johnson, tripped up by Akeem Ayers. Michael Brockers and Mark Barron shut down the middle on 2nd-7, but Johnson bounces outside, where there's no resistance because Gregg Williams called a blitz, and when the Rams get to Johnson, it's idiot clown McDonald tackling him forward five yards for a 1st down. 9 yards. Nick Fairley way overcelebrates the Rams' first run stop of the game. Nice pass breakup by Lamarcus Joyner vs. John Brown in the end zone. 3rd-10 at the 17, now 3rd-15 as the Cardinals help the Rams out with a delay of game. Barber points out AZ's red zone problems in the first meeting.
And, so much for that. Brockers gets close on pass rush, but Palmer hits J.J. Nelson in the back of the end zone for a 22-yard TD. Arizona decided very quickly to pick on Joyner, but this isn't his fault; he correctly gave Nelson up to Mo Alexander and Alexander took a terrible angle picking Nelson up, probably biting on a move. 7-0 Arizona We're off to a long day in St. Louis.
No, Alexander was just in poor position; Nelson didn't do anything special. It doesn't take anything special to embarrass the Rams these days. Benny Cunningham brings it out from 7 deep and wastes all our time by not making it to the 20. Rob Havenstein has returned at RT, btw, moving Garrett Reynolds back to LG, which should help the running game a ton. Or not, Todd Gurley loses three on his first @#$%^ touch; Ed Stinson, the LDE, the ONE GUY YOU SHOULD GET BLOCKED ON A RIGHT SWEEP, rubs off Havenstein, Cody Wichmann doesn't pick him up, tackle. Wow, Frank Cignetti remembered the slant route! Nick Foles play-actions, still gets it out in about a second and hits Brian Quick (!) for 14. Gurley gets the right edge for 5; superb block by Havenstein, with Lance Kendricks double-teaming effectively. I should note they're running away from Campbell so far. THE WILDCAT IS BACK; Gurley fakes a jet sweep to Tavon Austin and keeps it for 3. Barber has mentioned that Patrick Peterson will shadow Austin this week, btw. 3rd-2. Of all the plays Cignetti can call here, another run right for Gurley?!?!? The crowd is booing this before Foles even gets it handed off, which is awesome. Gurley had to cut back because Reynolds got overwhelmed by somebody named Rodney Gunter, and the Rams again LOSE yardage in a short-yardage situation. The right run was never going to work there anyway, and YET ANOTHER superb opening possession by the Rams on offense.
In the physical embodiment of getting too cute, Hekker moves up into shotgun, then, faking a fake, punts out of it. The Rams did catch Arizona with no deep man because of the fake look. And Hekker's punt rolled into the end zone.
I hate this team.
Laurinaitis stops Johnson after a couple, and much to my wondering eyes should appear, Jenkins is back on the field. Well, we all know Rams concussion protocols are notoriously hard to pass! Another McDonald blitz forces a rushed incomplete by Palmer. McDonald still yet to damage someone not on his team. But Jenkins makes a nice stop of Jenkins on a quick slant to get the 3-and-out. Austin gets a lot of room to return the punt; 9 yards to the Ram 35. Let's get fired up for more right-side handoffs!
Veteran WR Kenny Britt flinches before the snap to cost the Rams 5. I hate this team. Long count by Foles, great blitz pickup by Gurley, and Foles goes deep for Britt down the far sideline. He has Justin Bethel beaten by a step but Rashad Johnson does a nice job to come over and pick the pass off around the AZ45. Pretty sure Foles is at fault here for leaving the throw too far inside. That needed to be out toward the sideline; Johnson actually caught it off Britt's inside shoulder. More precision offense from your St. Louis Rams.
I hate this team.
What are Foles and Britt high-fiving one another for on the sideline? They each have the Arizona D on their fantasy teams? Cardinals brilliantly have to take a timeout with the clock stopped. They're at their 36. Palmer hits Johnson over the middle for 10. Gregg Williams, btw, is an idiot. They're apparently going to lay ten yards off the receivers ALL DAY. The only tight coverage on that play was Nick Fairley dropping back in coverage on the TE. Nick Fairley, shutdown DT. Seriously, when can we start firing people around here? Will Hayes makes an outstanding inside move and bears down on Palmer, but he escapes to his right, and with Williams idiotically leaving everything open downfield with soft coverage, Palmer easily hits John Brown at the Ram 40 for another first down. Barron and Matt Longacre (!) hold Johnson to a couple. Fells gets wide open for another 1st down, but this should totally be OPI on John Brown for blocking Barron early. Excellent call by Bill Vinovich and crew. Make it 2nd-18. Joyner's all over a quick screen to Fitzgerald at midfield and stops him for a loss. 3rd-20. Barber modestly compares Joyner to himself. Ok then. Palmer and Floyd are not on the same page at all and Palmer's sideline pass falls harmlessly incomplete. Austin gambles right and lets the punt roll into the end zone.
Well, at least the Ram defense has gotten it together after that first possession, despite Williams' awful scheme. Markus Golden does a great job staying home, limiting an Austin jet sweep to a couple. Foles airs another deep throw, a back-shoulder that Britt gets to this time, beating Justin Bethel for 30. Uncharacteristic of Cignetti to actually do something smart and pick on whoever's not Patrick Peterson. Just when I say that, ANOTHER PITCH RIGHT to Gurley is blown up for -3. CAN WE RUN FREAKING LEFT FREAKING ONCE? The legendary GUNTER ran right over Reynolds, who is usually a lot better than this garbage today, to blow it up from the backside. Havenstein didn't get anything done on the edge, and Harkey led and didn't block anybody. God, at least hit somebody on a double-team if you can't find your block.
SECOND QUARTER
Jared Cook's heard from for the first time all day, with a false start. PENALTY #2. I hate this team. 2nd-18. Foles throws from a collapsing pocket and hits Cook on a crossing route for 9. Stupid of Arizona to blitz here, and Honey Badger doesn't disguise it at all, but it still works. Greg Robinson gets very little of him. The Rams were in a 31 formation left, so he badgered Foles away from 3 of his receivers and Nick ended up throwing it away. How can you do anything but hate this team?
Hekker's punt at least dies at the 4 this time. I wish this led me to believe Arizona will still not score. And how the hell this ball is spotted at the 5 when it clearly died at the 4, I have no idea. The Rams avoid a 95-yard TD by inches. Williams foolishly called a double-A-gap blitz. Palmer hit John Brown on a quick slant. Jenkins got caught flat-footed, foolishly dived for Brown's feet and missed. Had Ayers not gotten off a Fells block at the 19, Brown easily could have been gone. Gregg Williams obviously has Carson Palmer on his fantasy team. BRUTAL DPI by Marcus Roberson, running into and grabbing Brown. Put Arizona across midfield. Johnson runs through Joyner for another 6. Draw to Johnson for another 10. It's another run right through ANOTHER STUPID OVERSHIFT, with Fitzgerald keeping Joyner out of the hole and Bobby Freaking Massie embarrassing the crap out of Aaron Donald, driving him 5 yards downfield and wiping him out. The Rams get to Palmer late, but he still gets off a nice deep sideline pass for Floyd. Luckily, Jenkins is there to break it up. Great play. And, hey, a blitz works. Joyner and Barron come off each edge and Joyner makes a sweet move on guard Ted Larsen to get Palmer for sack #1. That will probably be split with Donald, who blew up and beat center Lyle Sendlein. Barber again modestly praises Joyner by saying how much he looks like him. That act's wearing a little thin. Bring in Tiki. 3rd-14, Roberson actually breaks up an out route to Fitzgerald to force a punt. Well, that stop was pretty unexpected, as the Rams continue to outplay their DC's awful play-calling. Arizona butchers downing the punt inside the 5, then Darren Bates makes a MUCH too dangerous play by scooping the ball around the 10. Damn lucky to avoid a turnover there, and a damn stupid play; it was going to get spotted at no worse than the 10 without any Ram having to touch it.
TRE MASON IS IMMEDIATELY BURIED FOR A 2 YARD LOSS as Garrett Reynolds GETS BURNED AGAIN. When the Rams stupidly overshift, Arizona runs for 10 yards. When the Cardinals do it, THIS. I hate this team. THE RAMS HAVE RUSHED FOR TWO NET YARDS. I'm surprised it's that much! Rams line up 31 left again; nothing open but Foles finds Mason underneath for 7. Wes Welker sighting in trips left; Foles is looking for him all the way and hits him for 9 on an out route. FIRST DOWN! Quick screen to... Harkey?!?!? for 4. The dreaded TE rollout pass works as well as it ever does - Cook gets 3, nearly fumbling it away. 3rd-3. Run right, right? Trips left, Foles looking for Austin all the way, pumps twice, scrambles and can't hit Britt on the sideline with a desperation throw. The first pump by Foles looked like the right move - Arizona had Austin covered there - but he should have thrown to Tavon the 2nd time, would have been an easy first. The Rams will punt yet again. Great coverage by Cody Davis forces Patrick Peterson to let the ball bounce and gains the Rams 5-6 yards field position.
Arizona at their 12. SIMPLE BUBBLE SCREEN TO FITZGERALD FOR 21. Jenkins, as usual, couldn't get off a block (by Jermaine Gresham). Sendlein got out and not only completely dominated Joyner, but pushed him into McDonald for a 2-for-1. Johnson off right tackle for another 18, THROUGH ANOTHER STUPID GOD DAMN OVERSHIFT and Fitzgerald expertly cut-blocking Ayers in the hole. Johnson is averaging 5.8 yards a carry; the Rams have run for 2 yards all game. I hate this team. Pitch left to Johnson, following a convoy for 7. You know, the kind of play Cignetti should have tried AT LEAST ONCE BY NOW. Johnson up the middle for 2.98, leaving 3rd-and-inches. I'd play-action for the TD here. Arizona does throw, and the Rams do pick up Johnson well out of the backfield, but Roberson lets Brown beat him with a simple comeback route for 8. Awesome. I do think Fisher owes us a challenge here. I'll assume the head linesman had a good look at his feet, but I think a juggled catch ruling is possible. No. No replay, no challenge. We don't even get a good replay from Fox because Arizona has wisely rushed the next play and handed off to Johnson. Jeff Fisher's ass just got outcoached here yet again. Ayers at least stops Johnson for a loss. 2nd-11 at the Ram 31. Delay shotgun handoff to Johnson seemed ill-advised, and Barron is all over him for another stuff. The blitz seems a stupid idea here but works to perfection as Mo Alexander (!) is in around Massie before the RT can figure out what's going on for the Rams' 2nd sack. Credit to the Ram coaching staff for bouncing back these last two plays and pushing Arizona back out of FG position. Arizona attempts to tip a bouncing punt back across the goal line, with JENKINS crazily grabbing the ricochet and trying to return it, but only making the 5. What is going on with punt returns this week? Also, PENALTY #3, holding, JENKINS. That was committed at the 20 and would spot the ball at the 10, but Arizona logically takes the result of the play to start the Rams at the 5. In other words, Jenkins screwed the pooch on that play every way he possibly could.
To vindicate Jenkins a little bit, and Bates earlier, according to Barber, Arizona touching both of those punts first means they weren't risking anything attempting to return them. I assume, then, a lost fumble would have been returned to the spot of the Arizona touch? No wonder so many referees are ex-lawyers.
Rams ball at their 5 with 1:59 left, not that I'm expecting them to get anywhere. Havenstein lines up jumbo left and the Rams STILL RUN RIGHT, but Gurley gets 5 off a strong seal block by Wichmann. DROP BY QUICK on a quick slant; Foles did not appear to get the ball cleanly from center and the timing could easily have been off. Trips left and Foles goes deep right for Quick, broken up by Bethel. Hekker blasts the punt about 65 yards but Peterson returns it to the 40. 1:00 to halftime.
Safety blitz gets to Palmer late but Fitzgerald beats Jenkins' soft coverage for 15. TO#2 by Arizona. Delayed blitz does nothing and Palmer hits Floyd in front of Roberson for another 16. Palmer spikes to kill the clock at 0:39. Another blitz fails and the Cardinals have TWO receivers open at the 18 on the sideline. Nelson beat Roberson and Johnson beat Ayers. Nelson makes the catch. Coverage couldn't be more screwed up today if Gregg Williams tried. Williams wins me over with this next play, though, and why the hell hasn't he been running this all year? 3-man rush ***with Aaron Donald at end***, and he whips Massie, flushes Palmer into a scramble, and draws a hold. Ha, Will Hayes was the nose tackle on the play. Arizona at the 27 with 0:28 left. BARRON BLOWS AN INT. RIGHT IN HIS DAMN HANDS as Williams fooled Arizona again dropping guys off the line into coverage and bringing 3 again. Worked in Arizona, working here. Quick slant to Floyd for about 11, and Bruce Arians uses his last TO. 3rd-and-8. 3-man rush again, Roberson breaks up a sideline pass for Floyd. That drive was the game in Arizona redux. Gregg Williams didn't look like he had a clue for 80 yards of the field but locked things down in the red zone with 3-man rush. There's a key to beating Arizona if (many) better teams than the Rams are paying attention. Chippie FG for Chandler Catanzaro as Barber votes Kurt Warner for HoF. 10-0 Arizona
The Ram offense gets to come out for a kneeldown so the home fans can boo them off the field. Kudos to Barber for saying they should be booed off the field.
HALFTIME ADJUSTMENTS
The Rams are almost right in a game they deserve to be getting blown out of. I hate the hell out of Williams' coverage scheme today, but he's continued to stymie Arizona in the red zone. Jenkins is luckily still alive after that blast from McDonald and has kept Fitzgerald quiet in shadow coverage. I'll compromise and say Williams can keep his daffy coverages if he'll get rid of the damn stupid overshifts. Don't let Arizona just have big runs, huh?
The Rams need to fire Ted Cruz as their OC at halftime and hire Bernie Sanders. Can we run SOMETHING left today? Please? Let's get some pitches going and test their secondary in run support a little. Let's get the ball to Tavon Austin! How does Cignetti manage to forget him every other week? (Granted, Patrick Peterson may have a lot to do with that) I think they've been smart to pick on Bethel. They haven't been smart not to have Cook involved. And I'm going to keep calling for no-huddle. Dump off a lot if you want, but something's got to loosen up. The risk is quick 3-and-outs, but they have to try it a while, nothing else is happening. I wouldn't switch to Keenum because I don't think the deep-ball approach is a bad idea and he doesn't have the arm for it.
THIRD QUARTER
Fisher yells at his team before the kickoff to "catch the freaking ball", ha! Benny breaks a tackle on a 31-yard return to the 27. Play-action to Gurley, Foles goes left to Cook, he's open but a high pass is off BOTH HIS HANDS. CATCH THE FREAKING BALL! Double play-action, Foles gets surprised by the rush and fires deep for a double-covered Quick. Peterson just barely misses the INT. Good blitz pickup, Foles back-foots a throw over the middle Austin can't get to, and there's the quick 3-and-out I was afraid could happen if the Rams tried to get more aggressive offensively. I don't know what else to do. Things are completely different if stinking Cook catches that ball.
Nice punt by Hekker to pin Arizona at the 15. Great run clogging by Donald and Brockers, and Sims stops Johnson for no gain. Hayes then knifes inside a pull block and blows up Johnson on the edge for a 2-yard loss. Nice play. Donald gets to Palmer as he tries a dumpoff and gets a 3-and-out, backing up over Sendlein and spinning off him. That was another 3-man rush, and Williams appears to have found his play-calling groove.
And I'll be damned, Arizona outkicks coverage, Austin gets a huge hole at midfield and cruises off with a 65+yard return inside the Arizona 5. And I'll be double-damned, never mind, I think Daren Bates pretty obviously held Sean Weatherspoon at midfield and this @#$%#$ing thing is going to come all the way back to the 20. That hold was completely unnecessary to the play. No, wait, Chase Reynolds gets called for it, also an obvious hold, and a big reason for Austin's big lane. (PENALTY #4)
I hate this team.
Reynolds' hold was a spot foul, so the Rams do take over at their 49, their best field position of the day. AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RUN LEFT FOR ONCE. Gurley pops through a big downblock by Tim Barnes for 34. Ha, Barber agrees with my halftime adjustments, at least the quick passing game. Gurley gets buried after Wichmann can't get a block on the MLB. Foles' fade route attempt for Britt isn't even in bounds. Havenstein pushes a hot rush past Foles but Nick trips while stepping up and flubs a dumpoff attempt to Gurley. Boo, says the home crowd. Zach Hocker from 36 to put the Rams on the board. Arizona 10, Rams 3
Another knuckleball kickoff by Hekker, and Ask Kerwynn Williams again not only can't field it cleanly, he flubs it out of bounds at the 2. Momentum? Johnson gets the right edge but Ayers trips him up after a couple. Lots of time for Palmer on 2nd down; he hits Fitzgerald at the 9. That was a straight 4-man rush. 3rd-3, Donald buries Palmer as he throws, but he still gets off a deep, back-breaking sideline bomb to Floyd for 31. Jenkins was right there but couldn't locate the ball and turned the wrong way. AUUUUUGH! Confirming that the air has been let out of the D, Johnson runs through about 23 yards of shoddy defense. Barron overran him, Laurinaitis whiffed, he dragged both safeties 5 yards. The Rams are going to need some more red zone magic, because Arizona's going to be there pretty quickly. 6 more for Johnson as Hayes struggles getting off a Massie block. Quick screen to Fitzgerald gets another 1st, only just. More garbage defense as Kerwynn Freaking Williams takes off for 15 down to the 12. The Rams got caught blitzing Roberson, who got blocked, none of the linemen got off their blocks, and McDonald, since he wasn't clobbering one of his own teammates into oblivion, whiffed in the hole to turn him loose. I hate this team. Roberson gets a great jump and cuts off a sweep to Johnson, and Barron hits him and forces the ball out, but NATURALLY, can't recover the fumble, as Brockers slides out of bounds, barely, before he corrals it. And, naturally, though this is pretty obvious on replay, here comes the challenge flag from Fisher now. I give up with this guy. Refs got this one right. The call stands, though, with the explanation given, I don't know why Vinovich didn't say "confirmed". The home crowd is unhappy. Fisher is 1-for-5 on challenges this year. I hate this team. Smoke route to Brown, out of bounds at the 10.
Palmer fires to Johnson between Barron and Jenkins, who brilliantly crash into one another, for a 10-yard TD. Jenkins got wiped out again and stays down. I would say Jenknis was attempting to jump the route, but at the same time, Barron tried to leap over to try to knock the ball down, and the only place he could come down was on top of Jenkins. 17-3 Williams' coverage scheme didn't work that time.
Pretty sure this game has entered screw-this mode. From what Chris Myers just said, Arizona has had the ball for 27 of the 40 minutes played so far. Awesome, Barron's getting checked on the sideline for what looks like a shoulder injury. Bubble screen to Marquez for 5 off a fake jet sweep to Austin. Jenkins and Kendricks are out now due to concussions, not that we'll notice Kendricks is missing. Actually, we do right away; Gurley gets stuffed up the middle after Cook can't block Golden at all. Arizona blitzes off both edges on 3rd down, and Welker is wide open for a 7-yard out route, so, of course, Foles air mails a pass five yards out of bounds to the boos of the home fans. Yeah, it's Keenum Time. Another 65-yard punt or so by today's only Rams star, Hekker, and the crowd acknowledges it sarcastically. Arizona starts around their 20 thanks to nice coverage downfield by Marquez.
Another huge god damn hole for god Kerwynn damn Williams for 15. Jared Veldheer turned Eugene Sims and Laurinaitis got blocked and never got close to the lane. Very solid pocket for Palmer, 12-yard out to Gresham beats McDonald. Barber is not wrong that the Ram D looks very uncompetitive right now. Could be tired, though. Barron seems OK, though, blowing up a screen to Fitzgerald. Roberson makes a nice play to break up a sideline pass to Floyd. Brockers injured on the play. He had a beeline at Palmer but pulled up on the play and gets help limping off. Well, there's what the Rams need. They also need more cotton candy-soft coverage on 3rd-and-12, as Floyd beats Roberson yet again for 15, though I would swear he's obviously bobbling the ball. Hell yeah, he is; there's NO WAY he was in bounds with control of that ball. Another great NON-challenge by Fisher. Quick snap by Arizona, and away we go. Freaking Kerwynn God Damn Williams bolts off with a 35-yard TD, and you can commence booing this worthless piece of garbage Rams team NOW. Fairley gets mauled and turned inside. Longacre gets buried by a pull-block on the outside. Idiot Gregg Williams is blitzing, so Barron runs out of the play and Ayers is well behind it. The bitterly disappointing Laurinaitis is YET AGAIN blocked out of a play by the tight end. McLeod whiffs badly downfield, Roberson and Joyner don't appear all that interested in chasing him down, and not just this game, but this whole damn worthless season, are definitely now in screw-this mode.
Any argument that this team hasn't quit on Jeff Fisher at this point is clueless, and oblivious, and if he says I and others like me can kiss his ass for saying that this week, he can kiss my ass. And for 31 of the other 32 NFL owners, I'd happily be saying he could kiss his own ass goodbye after this season. Naturally, St. Louis has got the one.
I. HATE. THIS. TEAM.
Oh, Cardinals 24-3, btw
Benny gets a 41-42 yard return out to the 34, but PENALTY #5, holding, Cody Davis, takes it back, of course. Costs the Rams 19 yards of field position. I hate this team. Flip to Austin on an end-around only gets 12 because he doesn't really turn on the jets despite getting an acre of open space. Barber points out that's his SECOND touch on offense. Another LEFT run gets about 15 for Mason. Good blocking by Greg Robinson there. Glad I haven't called his name a lot today, actually. Myers and Barron are somehow surprised the Fisherball offense is not in a hurry down 21. Do you ever watch this team?
FOURTH QUARTER
The Rams fake a bubble screen to Mason and Foles goes deep to Cook, WHO IS OBVIOUSLY INTERFERED WITH by Bethel, who pushed him to prevent the catch, but somehow Vinovich, who had been having an excellent game, picks the flag up. Myers and Barber just as idiotically confirm the call - sure, it's completely OK to two-handed SHOVE a receiver downfield with the ball in the air, that's NEVER flagged, guys - but Barber does make a good point that Foles hung the damn long throw up again. Mason works very hard for 3 after Foles is pressured into a dumpoff. Blitz is picked up, but nothing's open, Foles scrambles right and throws for Cook, but Cook had brilliantly been out of bounds and couldn't legally make the catch. And of course the Rams are punting from midfield here. Screw this whole team.
Arizon at their 11. Smoke route to Fitzgerald for 4 and his 999th career catch. And a quick out to him for 7 more and his 1,000th. Congratulations, but that mark is surely cheapened because about 950 of those catches have come against the worthless Rams. The Rams actually hold #$#%^&#$ Williams under 30 yards on a carry; McDonald gets him for a loss on a run blitz. Joyner thumps Brown on a quick hitch for 3. Rams get away with a stupid blitz on 3rd-and-7 when Joyner breaks up a pass for Floyd. Punt is way short and fair-caught by Austin at the 39.
Slow release, but Foles hits Britt across midfield on a quick slant as they FINALLY GO TO NO-HUDDLE. Austin's open on the far sideline for 24 more on a corner route. Huh, no-huddle and they move the ball. WHO EVER COULD HAVE GUESSED THAT? Next, of course, DROP BY COOK. Marquez fights hard for 6 on a quick hitch to beat a blitz. Bethel has Quick covered tightly, and probably a little too physically, as an end zone pass falls incomplete. On 4th-4, hear the jeers from the crowd as Cook finally catches a damn ball at the 9 for a 1st. 1st-goal, Golden whips Havenstein to flush Foles, who spots Britt in the back of the end zone but puts it up way too high. Foles got Britt drilled by Bethel there instead of getting him the wide open TD he should have. Foles beats another blitz with an end zone throw for Cook, who beat Deone Bucannon with a double-move, but, as usual, if there's a contested ball, Cook's going to lose the contest, and he fails to come down with a poor underthrow. Timing was there, play-calling was there, execution on both ends was not. 3rd-and-goal, Foles throws to the back of the end zone for Austin, who, well, is at the 3, and I have no god damn idea what this team is trying to do any more, besides NEVER SCORE. And, of course, on 4th-and-goal, with another blitz coming, Foles settles for a 5-yard pass to Marquez, who doesn't get in.
I think Donald clotheslines Stepfan Taylor down at the 7. Freaking Taylor gets away for another 9. Brockers is back to whiff at the line, Hayes got blocked 10 feet out of the play, Taylor faked Roberson out of his jock. I hate this team. Donald seems to be the only defender playing now, dropping Taylor for 1. I think McLeod trips him on 2nd down after a couple more. Let's blitz and give up 40 on a stupid screen pass; it would make my day complete. 176 rushing yards for Arizona. No, just as good. With all the secondary injuries, the Rams end up with McLeod trying to cover John Brown out of a stack formation, and John Brown burns him deep for 68. Just a mismatch from the get-go. Also, FUCK YOU, BRUCE ARIANS. Jeff Fisher's ass deserves to get the score run up on him, but damned if I'm going to be collateral damage. Somebody needs to go for Palmer's knees here. TO for Arizona at 5:03. Why is he still in the game anyway? Floyd beats Joyner pretty badly on a fade route but can't make the catch in the end zone. David Johnson's back from fumble exile; Barron stops him for 2. 3rd-8 at the Ram 11. Stupidly, it's a blitz, and Palmer could have run it in but makes a bad flip toward Johnson anyway, incomplete. Surprised Arians doesn't go for it, but Catanzaro makes it 27-3.
Narrating what this worthless football team does feels like standing over the remains of a burned-out building. There's nothing to talk about. At least grass growing or paint drying is something making progress.
Benny out to the 36 with the kickoff, making him one of today's few decent Rams players. Him, Barron, maybe Hekker, who else? Quick out to Hekker for 5 as we're now talking about Barber's high-school track career. Seriously? And here's another ball off Quick's god damn hands. Seriously? Poor throw behind him, but seriously? Jared Cook SHOCKINGLY cuts off a route in traffic so he can't get hit and Foles nearly throws a pick on 3rd down expecting him to run it out. For Christ's sake. What's the reason to keep more than about 10 people from this entire organization after the season?
Arians empties the bench with 3:44 left, putting Drew Stanton in. Joyner whiffs a tackle on Floyd, and, yes, I actually just got joy from McLeod injuring McDonald with a reckless hit and am starting to think I should really find a new team, if not a new sport. Joyner gets a flag for a massive hold of Nelson. For God's sake, they're not even going to stop the Cardinal scrubs. Now they draw a DPI on Roberson with another classless deep throw. Arians' hate for Jeff Fisher is real. I still don't know why Williams isn't sending every player at somebody's knees. Cardinals at the Ram 35. Johnson for 4 at the 2:00 warning, and they actually kneel it out from there instead of going deep again.
Much respect to Larry Fitzgerald, but I have no intention of rooting for the classless swill on the Arizona sideline. Go Carolina Panthers.
Ha, only one F-bomb through all this garbage, not bad. The road to 4-12 rolls on.
-$-
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